Einstein : Not everything that can be counted counts. And not everything that counts can be counted.

Wednesday, 1 August 2007


A radio, somewhere, suddenly crackles into life, there is an alarm actuation at a building site, security bloke has seen someone climbing over the security fence into the site. Double jeopardy for someone.

Why is it that security fencing is never really that secure ?

Also, why is it that night security staff are always blokes, normally the wrong side of 50 and about 9 stone or are foreigners with barely a word of English ?

Anyway, suddenly my radio crackles into life. I am requested at a confirmed alarm at a building site. The same one as above, funnily enough. Trouble is that I am umpteen miles away and that district has no dog cover. Trouble is that its absolutely hammering down, again. I have to leave the area I'm patrolling because of what our statiticians call a 'developing trend'. Contrary to my perception of the management trust, I am able to work out where stuff is happening.

I make the usual checks,aks the usual questions but still cannot make an accurate informed decision so hit the blues & twos and hit the gas for depths of Upton Chutney or where ever this place is. I check that containment is on and hope that our intruder is still within the site.

After 25 minutes at mach .05 and a bit I arrive. Can't find the unit at the scene, can't find the security guard anywhere. Local unit is at the back containing, its still hammering down. Me and the lad get out, head for the rear of the site. I haven't gone far and I come across the containment. Both are sat in the car sheltering from the elements. Both are dry. Its been raining for at least 4 hours solid. They have driven as far around as they can go to contain said site. Security bloke buggered off ages ago he has another couple of sites to check and we are to ring him if anything is amiss. Suddenly I begin to realise I am the only one who gives a toss. In only a few minutes of being outside I am soaked. I follow the fence and find a hole. I begin to search the site and find several more holes. How on earth anyone saw anyone climbing over is a complete joke. There are multiple ways in and out and I have not included over or under as well. Colditz this is not,soakditz it most certainly is. Itis also mudditz, as the site activity and the rain over the passing of time have turned the site into some form of tank training course. I even ignored the hard hat and trip hazard signs as well.

I carry on searching and then after a further 20 minutes of immersion I finish with no result. There was never likely to be a result. But I did this because thats what we do. We support our colleagues. On this occasion they gratefully receive my specialist support from the dry comfort of their vehicle. Perhaps a few drops got through the three inch gap when we spoke briefly. How the hell can anyone contain anywhere when this is all the resources available anyway ? I suppose I was fortunate that they hadn't been called away to another job.

Then to add insult to injury I find out that there is another addition to the 'developing trend' figures and hot foot it back through the rain to more familiar territory only to find that the local units have completed the search because I was so far away, even though I told them I was winging my way back to them.

They've all gone, resumed to other duties or just to stay dry. I can't stay dry, I can't even get dry. Everything I own is wet. Sometimes you just can't win. Would I change this for another job ?

No bloody chance.


Mousie said...

I know just how you feel.
I wouldn't do any other job either.

Great post.
And thanks for the link.


Metcountymounty said...

Dito, great post.

Out of interest, do you just have a GP dog or have you got a drug/expo as well?

Anonymous said...

Look on the bright side....They didn't wander through the scene first THEN bugger off!!

Anonymous said...

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